Executives
Congratulations! You’ve ascended the ranks and you’re in the big time. Problem is, it’s a Pyrrhic victory: You’ve won the battle but you’re losing the war. Your job is pretty much the only place where you feel like you are #winning. Make no mistake, this doesn’t mean you are happy there. In fact, you feel trapped and drowning in responsibility. But, quitting and doing something else isn’t really an option, at least not right now. So, you displace your feelings onto your family and employees. And, they are all real sick of you constantly losing your shit. You’ve even caught a few of them calling you a fucking dick under their breath. They’re not wrong. You’re turning into your father and you hate yourself for it. But you don’t know how to not act like this. You’ve tried. Sheer willpower got you far in your career, but for some reason, it is not fixing your attitude or improving your sanity. Now, you’re a functioning alcoholic-workaholic.
Intuitives
You wonder why everyone is so concerned about the zombie apocalypse. In your opinion, it’s already here. You’ve tried so hard to live a normal life, the supposed “dream,” but you’re so bored you could scream. Most of your life, you’ve felt different because you seemed able to sense things others couldn’t, and you’ve worried that there was something wrong with you. You’ve always dreamed of a fairy tale life, complete with a soulmate, financial abundance, life purpose, soul friends who were just like you, and magic, like legitimate magic. But, now that you are faced with “reality,” you are beginning to think that you just had unrealistic expectations of what life was supposed to be like, that you’re asking for too much. The trouble is, this “real” life doesn’t feel like a life worth living. It feels like something inside of you is dying. You’ve tried pretty much everything suggested in the societal rule book, but nothing seems to be helping you feel connected, alive, happy or less defective. You seriously can’t take it. If only there was something different you could try…
